Sunday, February 17, 2013

Marital Lessons Learned in a Roadtrip

 Spending 8+ hours a day in a car with your spouse can be an invigorating, frustrating, inspiring or just downright rip-your-hair-out experience.  Ryan and I have two very distinct personalities.  My husband is one of the bravest, smartest, and funniest people I know.  However, he still pisses me off sometimes.  I'm stubborn, can be selfish and sometimes I just need him to understand what I want or need, even if I can't communicate it effectively.

Sitting in a car for numerous hours with him can be a dance.  There are moments when it's a beautiful waltz and we're laughing and sharing stories.  Other times it's the beginning lesson and you're avoiding painful stubbed toes and awkward movements.  You don't want put yourself out there for a solo if you can't back it up with your own credibility.  Sometimes I'm just there, by myself, freestyling because somebody has to be the ballsy one.

There were moments when something would just be a downright argument or fight.  You don't want to take the blame or own up to a mistake.  There were times when we forgot to show that we appreciate each other.  Patience had run out and so did windshield wiper fluid.  Of course this was the exact moment that a semi was driving in front of us and managed to kick-up as much slush and dirt as possible on the window.

It's all about understanding that sometimes, you have to put aside selfish desires or thoughts because your spouse needs you.  Ryan gets stressed about things and if I can contact someone that has the right answers or simply Google it, it makes life infinitely easier on him.  For me, I appreciate the security that he provides.  He is the most responsible young man I know.  I always call him an "old man" because of his tendencies and mannerisms but he is my favorite person.  Every time I look at him, I just fall in love.  He is the handsomest man I have ever seen.  Being able to look over from the passenger seat and see the mountains of Tahoe National Park in the background was breathtaking.  It put everything into perspective.  We are driving to our new home that we will share together for four years and that is a beautiful thing.  This will be home that we'll most likely have our first baby in, we'll make memories and friends, and our families will visit us and say, "our own babies are so grown with babies of their own." 

My favorite parts of the trip were the moments he would say, "Kim, look at that! Take a picture."  I would pull out my camera and snap a few shots of the absolutely stunning scenery.  I so greatly appreciate the route he chose for us to drive on because the landscape was incredible.  The mountains were truly "purple mountains majesty" and the snow was sprinkled across the most beautiful trees, making them sparkle.  I know that by verbalizing how much I loved the view, Ryan felt a sense of pride.  I don't always tell him that I appreciate the things that he does for me and he does a lot.  He sacrifices his comforts and concerns to make me happy.  He is an incredible husband and sometimes do fight but I can't stand being mad at him or to see him upset.

There are the moments when you need to breakdown and the only cure is a kiss from that wonderful bearded man.  When I am at my worst and am hating everything that is going on, he pulls me into a strong hug and kisses my head, kisses my lips, and tells me everything will be fine.  We work better as a team and celebrate our small victories with elaborate high fives.  We cheer each other on for our accomplishments and are there to pick up the broken pieces of our failures.

3 days later and we're at the place that we call home, together as a family.

Thanks for reading!

Be sure to check out this month's featured blog:


  1. If you can survive a 3 day road trip to move to your new home, you can survive anything! And I LOVE that picture of you guys...amazing!


  2. I love it Kim! This post expresses not just your excitement for MT, and the hectic-ness of a road trip. But it also clearly lays out just how madly in love with Ryan you are..and that's beautiful. I wish you both the very best of happiness in this exciting journey ahead! :)


  3. Remember to read this post when you settle into your new "normal" and the dance speeds up and gets more complicated. I smiled reading your description of looking over at him. Thanks for sharing!